If you want to learn how to turn a girl on, then you NEED to understand why hobbies are so powerful at building attraction with women.
First, hobbies communicate that you’re a well-rounded human being who is passionate about something.
The guitarist, competitive boxer, and amateur cyclist all have something in common: they’re human. They’re in touch with the human experience, with their passion, and with life. Women find this incredibly attractive.
Second, they grant you access to certain social circles that would previously be unavailable to you; and they sometimes catapult you up to the alpha male of the social circle.
Being involved with a certain hobby will put you around others who are also involved in that hobby. Sometimes they’ll be men, and sometimes they’ll be women. Either way, a good hobby will expand your social circle and will help you make friends and get more girls.
This is perhaps the most important thing that you could take from this article: DO NOT be a douchebag and take up a hobby JUST to get laid.
Girls can see right through this and it’s a huge turn off. To be fair, some girls don’t really care, but most girls, in my experience, do.
Paradoxically enough, when you start understanding women better, you’ll start to realize that a lot of the “conventional” dating advice is bullshit.
Instead, take up a hobby that you’re PASSIONATE about and women will naturally flock to you; so will other men who are passionate.
Men want to be around other men who are alive, and living life. Hobbies are a major indicator that a man is alive and hasn’t had his humanity crushed by the system.
When women see that you’re passionate about something, they become incredibly turned on; and what’s funny is that it doesn’t even matter what you’re passionate about. You just have to be passionate about something.
You could be passionate about mixing your own music to become a DJ, about living a healthy lifestyle by practicing yoga, hiking, and eating organic, or about brewing your own beer. Just be passionate about something.
Generally speaking, any hobby will be attractive if you follow one simple guideline. Yes, I really mean that. Any hobby, from the traditionally “attractive,” hobbies like singing or car restoration, to the nerdy hobbies like World of Warcraft or competitive gaming.
The key is to be unapologetically passionate about it.
That’s it. Don’t be ashamed of your hobby, because you think it’s “weird,” or “nerdy,” or whatever—just embrace it. Don’t try to prove anything, and just be okay with it. Express your passion for it, and don’t be ashamed of it.
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Now, this doesn’t mean that if your hobby is “organizing my 15,000 gigabyte collection of porn,” you’ll be able to make it attractive. That isn’t a hobby—it’s an excuse to not meet actual women.
A hobby is something that you’re passionate about, not something that you use as a crutch or a coping mechanism.
With that rule in mind, there are some things that you might consider hobbies, but that are actually just crutches or coping mechanisms.
For example, maybe you love video games. The question is, however: do you actually have a social life or do you just game all day?
I play World of Warcraft all the time. I love playing video games… BUT, and here’s the key, I also learn how to be a better man, and constantly spend time growing and improving myself.
If you actually have a social life, you’ll find girls that are also passionate about gaming and develop a connection that will probably lead to sex and maybe even a relationship.
If you have zero social life and just use video games as an excuse to stay in your room all day, then it isn’t really a hobby. It’s a coping mechanism—a dysfunctional crutch. So, with this in mind, find the things that you’re passionate about that make you feel alive.
Now, you should still be aware that there are some hobbies which naturally attract women more than others.
Here are four hobbies that fall into this category.
If you want to know how to get laid FAST, learn how to plan the guitar.
As someone who’s been playing the guitar and singing since I was 14 years old, I can personally attest to its ability to wet panties. You have to actually be good, though—and you have to be passionate about it.
Don’t just expect to have the ladies chasing you if you whip out your guitar at a party and play “Wonderwall” for them. Most girls will sense that you’re trying to pick them up by playing the guitar, and it comes off as needy and weird.
That being said though, some girls don’t even give a fuck as long as you’re good. There’s been times where I’ve obviously tried to use my guitar to pull girls, and it still works.
When I was 19 years old, my buddy rented a beach house in South Carolina for our spring break. I, having played the guitar for 5 years, decided to be a giant fucking douchewad and bring it to pull girls. And it worked.
The first night we got there, there were three absolutely stunning girls squeezed into some tight booty shorts; two were sitting on the couch across from me, and one was sitting right next to me. I had my guitar out and was ready to put on a show.
Up until then, the girls had been doing that typical “I’m a hot girl and I’m not impressed,” thing where they act all blase towards you.
Hell, I even tried negging a couple of them, and NOTHING worked. It was 100%, full throttle, hot girl blase.
All of that changed when I started strumming those chords and putting my 3 years of singing lessons to use.
“Oh my god,” one of them shouted. Their eyes lit up, and one of them whipped out her phone to record me.
I did an acoustic rendition of “Babe I’m Gonna Leave You,” by Led Zeppelin, and the girls loved it. The one right next to me literally just put her hand on my leg and started rubbing it. The other two started to get jealous that she was right next to me, and they started playing with their hair.
“Wow—you’re so good! Oh my god, are you a celebrity?” Fuck, I was in.
Fast forward to 3AM: after several glasses of jungle juice, the only ones left standing were me and two girls. My buddies were passed out, either on the floor, in a bed, or on the private beach somewhere.
“Hey—can you show me where the bathroom is?” one of the girls said. “Yeah, sure,” I told her. I unlocked the door to my bedroom, and led her to the bathroom by the hand. Before I knew it, she was grabbing my junk and making out with me.
This is what happens when you’re really good at a cool hobby, like playing the guitar and singing.
Obviously it won’t happen every single time, and obviously a lot of her attraction for me was because I had my shit together (I was jacked as hell, had style, knew game, etc.), but there’s no way she would’ve had that type of a reaction if I hadn’t sung her and her friends a song.
I would recommend that you buy an inexpensive beginner’s guitar to see whether or not you’re passionate about it. You could consider signing up to take some lessons near you, but I learned probably 75% of my craft from YouTube videos and online tutorials.
If you want to learn how to sing (which I highly recommend) I’d either invest in some lessons or a DVD course. I took some lessons in person, but to be honest they were garbage. Private instructors charge like $50 a session, and half of the session is just doing warm-ups.
Instead, I’d recommend buying a DVD course—my favorite is Brett Manning’s Singing Success. I swear, I learned literally 10x more from just the first hour of this course than I did from taking private lessons for the first year.
Once you get your guitar and singing DVD course, it’s just a matter of time. Practice, practice, practice. It’ll all pay off, my friend—trust me.
Traveling is one of those hobbies that won’t necessarily increase the quantity of women that you meet, but it will definitely increase the quality of women that you meet.
Yes, while you’re traveling you’ll definitely meet a lot of new girls that are willing to sleep with you (quantity). Foreigners are often times absolutely irresistible (assuming you’re normal and have a small amount of game).
Being American (or even white) will get you laid extremely easily in Asian countries, South America, the Middle East, and even Europe to an extent.
The real value that comes from traveling, however, is in the quality of women that you meet. When you travel as a hobby, you expose yourself to dozens of new experiences, reality paradigms, and cultures.
You gain an appreciation for fine wine by traveling to France, you learn how to salsa dance by visiting Brazil, and you understand the philosophy of the noble Samurai by living in Japan.
In other words, you become a cultured man. This will attract cultured women, which are the best type of women to have around.
Have you ever heard women say that a man is boring or bland? This could be for a lot of reasons, but one of the reasons for this is usually that he isn’t cultured. He doesn’t have worldly experience; his life has been limited to his mom’s basement.
Cultured women are fascinated by men that have traveled all across the globe; they love to hear stories about how you got in a drunken fight with a Kung Fu master at some bar in the center of Tokyo, how you were almost attacked by a shark when scuba diving in the Great Barrier Reef, and how you dated a stripper in Argentina for a few months (okay maybe not that one).
Even un-cultured girls have an appreciation for men who are cultured.
The country girl who’s never traveled outside of the USA loves being with a man who can confidently guide her through life; she trusts him, because he’s experienced. He’s been everywhere and done it all.
You’ll also be able to attract way more foreigners when you travel. Imagine seeing a gorgeous Russian girl in your local night club or bar, and watching her blow out and ignore literally dozens of guys.
Then, you mumble a little bit of Russian that you learned from living in Moscow for a few months; suddenly her eyes light up, because you’re not just some boring guy trying to hit on her.
You’re a man who’s traveled to her homeland and who can relate to what her childhood was like, living in Russia.
Or maybe it’s the Brazilian bitty that you meet out one night at a club, and you mention how you spent a year in Rio learning Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. If you learn game I can almost guarantee that she’ll end up sleeping with you.
The point is that traveling allows you to connect with foreign girls and cultured girls (aka higher quality girls) on a much deeper level, making the transition to sex so, so smooth.
Doing yoga will increase both the quality and quantity of women that you meet. Not only are most girls who do yoga very into living a healthy lifestyle, but they’re also very sensual (practicing yoga will do that to you).
As if this wasn’t enough, yoga classes are usually like 90% women, so if you’re attractive and have game it’s literally like shooting fish in a barrel.
I’ve personally done yoga on and off for about a year, and here’s a few tips on how to get laid from yoga:
Eventually, if you follow this advice, you’ll end up getting drinks afterwards with one of the girls, or maybe you’ll get invited to some sort of party. Just go, and be cool.
There’s actually two approaches that you can take with yoga: farming and hunting. I recommend farming.
Sound weird? Let me explain—farming takes longer, but reaps more rewards. Hunting doesn’t take as long, but will only feed you for the night.
In other words, you can try to get laid as fast as fucking possible, and maybe end up sleeping with a girl or two (hunting), or you can focus on actually developing friendships and gain access to their social circles (farming).
Which would you rather have: a one night stand with a hot yoga girl, or to be friends with her? Most guys would say “dude are you fucking stupid? I’d way rather just fuck her.”
This is literally retarded.
Do you have any clue what happens when you’re friends with a hot girl? She will literally be inviting you to all of her parties and you’ll get to meet DOZENS of gorgeous women through her. Hot girls always hang around other hot girls, so you’ll meet tons and tons of her friends.
And if she’s a good friend, she’ll literally introduce you to girls so that you can fuck them. “Hey, Jessica! This is my friend Jon, isn’t he cool?”
An introduction like that to a hot girl speaks one thousand times louder than any game you can spit.
In short, sign up for a yoga class, be genuine, and befriend girls.
That doesn’t mean you can’t sleep with them if they’re into you, but don’t make it your only concern. Realize that befriending hot yoga girls can often times be far more beneficial than just sleeping with her.
Studies have actually shown that when women watch men cook, they become extremely aroused. No joke.
In all seriousness, you shouldn’t even be cooking for women, though—you should be doing it so that you can count your calories, get jacked, and eat healthy. The whole “women wanting to fuck you, because they saw you saute that vegetable mix,” thing is just a benefit.
Seriously, though. You won’t be able to get jacked unless you are able to cook meals, and have a proper understanding of nutrition.
This is why I dedicated like 5 chapters to different types of diets in my fitness eBook, Body of an Alpha. It’s that important.
If you don’t know how to cook, don’t sweat it, though—you can easily learn online.
When I was first learning how to cook, I’d just google questions. If I was grilling some wild caught salmon, I’d just google “how long to grill salmon for,” or something. Once you’re moderately skilled in cooking, I recommend taking a cooking class.
Cooking classes are LOADED with women—they’re a great place to meet quality girls that are willing and able to cook for you.
Just by attending a cooking class, you’re already setting yourself apart from 99% of men. But if you show up with an already decent skill set, it’s on another level.
You can also invite girls over for dinner, and have them help you out in the kitchen. A date where you cook for them is almost a guaranteed lay.
Even just brewing coffee for them is a turn on. Instead of “grabbing coffee,” at Starbucks, I just tell them that I’m a coffee aficionado and can make them some at home.
This makes it SO much easier to get laid, for two reasons: we’re already at my house, and they get turned on watching me grind, brew, and pour their coffee (I use a french press). If you often take girls out on “Day 2’s” or second dates for coffee, I highly recommend this method.
There’s a few key points to take from this article:
If you internalize these three crucial points, your sex life will improve by leaps and bounds.
Not only will you attract higher quality women, but you’ll attract more of them. You need both of these to happen in order for your sex life to be optimal.
As a side note, one of the girls I know read this article and got angry at me for writing it. That’s usually how you know it’s true.
If you have any questions or concerns, be sure to leave them in the comments section below. I love hearing peoples’ success stories, answering peoples’ questions, and engaging with my readers.
Jon Anthony is a dating coach, fitness expert, and self-improvement guru. He dropped out of college to start Masculine Development in 2015, and has since been self-employed, helping men across the world achieve their best lives. You can best reach him on social media, or via email for questions.