Ah, text game—the idea that you can somehow make a girl wet over text and have her back at your place faster than a New York minute. Is it true, though? Can you REALLY have a girl hooked from just sending her a few texts, or is it all a bunch of PUA-made-up nonsense?
Well, the truth is that most of you are probably screwing up your texts big time. I see it every single day…girl sends guy a text, and gets the completely wrong response. Girl doesn’t respond. Guy freaks out, and sends more texts trying to fix the situation, but it only backfires in his face even more.
Does this sound like you? Well, if it does, then you NEED to know this—there’s actually four specific types of texts that women send you. What’s more, is that depending on the type of text you receive, you may have to respond in a different way to keep the attraction from going stale.
So whether you’re a high school student trying to get his first lay, or an experienced veteran in text game living in a Manhattan suite, you need to know the “text game” that women play. Because if you don’t, you’ll be left high and dry as she’s driving over to Chad’s place, and leaving you with your dick in your hand.
There’s four types of texts that women send you, and as I said, you’ll need to respond differently for each one. For some of these texts, you need to start making plans to hang out right away, and for others you may have to amplify your frame. It all depends on what she texts you.
Here’s a list of the four types of texts women send you, from “least interested” all the way to “most interested”:
Most guys don’t make it past the third type of text, because they simply don’t know how to text girls. As a matter of fact, my business partner Mark Sing put it best: “Dude, I’ve had so many people ask me to text girls for them. They just don’t get it—I’ve even thought about charging them a fee per text!”
…and that’s just how effective this stuff is. Again, most guys don’t know jack shit about the red pill, about female hypergamy, about the nature of women, and about how to seduce a girl. So, when you take the time to actually study this stuff, it will make you stand out like Brad Pitt in a crowd of midgets, and she’ll be desperate to chill with you.
This is by far the worst type of text, and usually happens early on in the interaction. You ask her some question, like where she went to college, or how long she’s staying in town for, and don’t get any response. Funny enough, this is actually one of the EASIEST problems to fix…if you have text game.
For the good old “text silence” that women give you, simply convey your personality more. See, the fundamental reason that she’s giving you silence is likely one of two things:
While it’s possible that she may have given you the number just to get you to go away, that’s not a text game issue—that’s just a game issue in general (if that’s the case, click here). The focus of this article isn’t meant to be on “game,” but rather on “text game,” so let’s talk about what you can do to remedy this situation once you’ve already got her number.
“Not giving her any value” basically means that you’re taking. You’re asking questions, you want information, you’re not being interesting. You’re just boring! So try expressing your personality more, make a joke, say something interesting, and maybe send her a meme or two. In my experience, memes work great to rescue stale interactions.
Ah, the good old shit test. Even though most men often interpret this as a negative, it’s actually FAR better than silence, because it means she’s at least interested. Girls don’t shit test guys who they aren’t interested in, so if you’ve made it from “silence” to “shit test” then congratulations…you’ve done well.
As I covered in my article on “How to Pass Shit Tests,” there’s only two strategies you need to understand:
This may take a little while to get the hang of it, but once you do it’s like pouring GOLD into your interactions. Girls will call you fat, say they have a boyfriend, or come up with some other test to see how you respond, and it’s crucial that you use one of these two strategies. They both convey confidence and certainty.
She says that you’re “probably texting ten other girls right now”? Respond by saying “Actually it’s only seven, it’s been kind of an off day.” She says that she “doesn’t like you”? Respond with “Wow, I don’t like you either. We have so much in common, this is perfect!” Just amplify, re-interpret, and you’ll be fine.
Third, there’s the logical phase. At this point she already has some interest in you, but isn’t interested enough for you to start making plans. Making it from here to the “positive/sexual” phase is what most guys have difficulty with, because there’s a lot of nuance involved. This is where you’ve really got to finesse it.
When the conversation falls under this category, the best thing to do is to just reply to her questions, but with a little bit of banter. Don’t be too boring, but don’t be too over-the-top with the banter, either. Throw a little bit out there, see how she responds in return, and if she responds well try adding a bit more.
Once it’s been logical for a few texts, you may want to start moving into stage four and making plans. Some girls won’t be too overt in their sexual attraction via text, so don’t push it too much. That being said, don’t be afraid to push it if she seems receptive. Again, this is where the finesse comes in.
Once you’re here, you’ve already made it (so long as you don’t mess it up). You’ll know you’ve made it to this phase once she’s sending you suggestive texts, flirting back with you, and maybe even sending you nudes. This is the “holy grail” of text game, because once you’re here it’s basically like being handed sex on a silver platter.
All you have to do now is just handle the logistics and make up—but DON’T drop it on her like a ton of bricks. This is the single biggest mistake that guys make when they’re trying to schedule a meetup with a girl. They just shoot her an all or nothing text like: “Hey, wanna meet up for drinks tonight at 8pm?”
This can easily work if you’ve ALREADY slept with her, but if you haven’t (or if it’s been a long time) you’ll need to ease into it. Sliding into a girl’s life is one of the greatest skills any PUA can acquire, and for good reason—it’s hard to do. That being said, it’s also the hallmark of a good player, and she’ll instantly recognize it. So instead, do something like this:
One of my favorite lines is: “So what do you think about drinks with cute guys?” Obviously she’ll say something positive, so from there it’s pretty much all said and done. Remember to always “assume attraction.” This is what it looks like—you just assume that you’re the cute guy, and that she’s into you. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
I get it. Learning how to text a girl can be confusing sometimes.
So, I’ve compiled a list of very commonly asked questions.
I get these questions emailed to me at least once a day, so here’s your answers!
Text game is simply the art of texting a woman, and building attraction over text.
Admittedly, this can be pretty hard for some guys. Text game is not something easily learned.
But, with a little bit of guidance, and by following my blog, you can easily master the art of text game.
The biggest key when texting a girl, is to keep it light and playful.
Most guys get way too deep and serious over text, which admittedly has its time, but overall is not a good idea.
You want to use the phone to generate FUN, and to set up a TIME to meet. Otherwise, it’s just a waste of energy.
You can do this by sending some of the alpha texts you’ll get in my Tinder Mastery eBook, if you want.
It comes free when you purchase my 7 Strategies, and it shows you the exact texts I used to bang over 100 girls from Tinder.
In general, you can text anything to a girl if you made a good first impression (in person).
If you don’t have game, and she just gave you her number to get you to go away, it’s going to be hard to text her effectively.
That being said, there’s a ton of alpha male texts you can send her, but it all depends on the context.
If you just met her for example, I like to start by texting her something cheeky.
For example: “Hey, it’s Jon, that sexy guy you wanted to bang from Tinder.”
…or: “Hey, it’s Jon. The guy you met out last night at the worst club in all of Las Vegas.”
If you can be cheeky and mention something that happened last night, that’s great, because it’s almost like an “inside” joke.
I’m almost afraid to say this, because most guys should NOT flirt over text.
Why? Because when you haven’t met her, this can create “first date anxiety.”
Now obviously there’s exceptions, but in general, focus on building COMFORT and setting up a date over text.
That being said, there’s a ton of ways you can flirt. Here’s an example from my Tinder Cheat Sheet, which you get as a free bonus when you purchase my 7 Strategies eBook.
I use this text all the time and it gets girls laughing, and it lets them know that I’m a sexual man. Again, use with caution though.
For most newbies, it’s best if you don’t flirt over text, and just use the phone to set up a TIME and a PLACE to meet her. Then, flirt in person.
What should you do when a girl doesn’t text you back? Well, here’s what you do.
Come up with a playful, fun text, that teases her, and doesn’t come off as NEEDY.
This is the biggest mistake I see guys making. They get way too needy when she doesn’t text back.
If she doesn’t text you back, that’s fine. Give her a week, and send her something fun, like this:
“Hey, it’s Jon… I vaguely recall meeting this cute girl who seemed into me, but haven’t heard anything from her in over a week. Do you think she went missing? Should I call for a search and rescue party?”
There’s a ton of texts like this in my Tinder eBook, but there’s just one for you. 9 times out of 10, if she’s still interested in meeting up with you, she’ll reply and you can set up a date on the spot.
All in all, text game is one of the most difficult things that guys struggle with—and it’s all because they don’t know this one formula. This simple four step roadmap to making plans with her will solve 95% of your problems when texting girls. Just refer to this article when you need, and follow it to a T.
The fact that you’ve even gotten her number means she’s at least somewhat interested, but a lot of the time it’s just a matter of conveying your personality. So don’t be boring! Sending her sexual memes often works wonders, but be sure not to go “over the top” with showing your intent.
If you’re interested, I also now give away my highly coveted “Tinder Lay Guide” as a free bonus when you purchase the “7 Strategies to Develop Your Masculinity” eBook. It’s gone through multiple iterations, and is the byproduct of literally 100+ girls I’ve slept with from Tinder, with examples and all.
I hope that you guys got some value from this article. I know that I’ve struggled a lot with text game in the past, but once you just memorize these four stages and figure out which one you’re in, things get infinitely easier. As always, if you have any comments or questions feel free to leave them down below—and I’ll see you next time!
The best thing to do after you first meet a girl is to text her right away, so she doesn't forget who you are. Text her your name, and something funny/cute about yourself, that references your interaction. This way you immediately put her in a good mood.
If, for example, you met her and started making jokes about Game of Thrones, maybe text her something like: "Hey, it's Jon... the cute guy who looks like Jon Snow" or something. This sets you apart from other guys in a very good way.
Many guys have a "3 day rule" or something like that, but the truth is that there's no "hard and fast" rule when it comes to texting a girl back. Sometimes you should wait over a week, and other times you shouldn't wait very long at all.
If you're trying to make plans with her, it's best to text her back within an hour. If, however, she ghosts you, it's best that you hit her up in a week or so as if nothing happened, asking when she's free, or sending her a funny meme.
Absolutely. Women typically aren't going to text you first, because it's the man's job to initiate an interaction and make the date happen. So, the best way to text her is start by making jokes and teasing her, and eventually move into setting up a day/time to meet up.
Memes are a great way to flirt over text, because everyone loves memes. Send her funny memes, and start off by testing the waters. If she seems to really like you, try making some sexual jokes and tease her a little bit.
The best way to flirt is to IMPLY things, but don't outright say them. You should never be too direct when it comes to sex, because this is usually a turn off for women. Instead, hint at things, tease her, and imply things, so that she makes the connection herself.
Jon Anthony is a dating coach, fitness expert, and self-improvement guru. He dropped out of college to start Masculine Development in 2015, and has since been self-employed, helping men across the world achieve their best lives. You can best reach him on social media, or via email for questions.