Anyone who’s been involved in the “PUA community” recently knows about the phenomena of shit tests.
Shit tests are snide little remarks that women throw at you to test you.
Depending on how you react, she’ll either become completely disinterested with you, or she’ll take note and start to view you as an alpha male. Most guys fail these “shit tests” miserably—and they have piss poor results with women to show for it.
Once you know how to pass them, however, you’ll notice that your success rate with women will sky rocket.
As said before, a shit test is a snide little remark that’s meant to test you. They’re a quick way for women to screen you to tell if you’re actually as confident as you’re acting, or if you’re secretly a little bitch.
Shit tests are meant to see if you have boundaries, if you’re insecure, and/or how strong your frame is.
Here are some common shit tests:
Generally speaking, any insult about your appearance is a shit test (when you’re hitting on a girl). Girls care very little about appearance, and much more about your game and status. This is what women truly want—a confident, cocky, badass man. Not some little boy.
Tell me if this has ever happened to you: You go out to a nightclub, and you’re having a pretty good time. You’re dancing, vibing to the sound of Calvin Harris’s deep bass, when suddenly a stunning girl catches your eye.
After lots of internal struggle, you work up the courage to go talk to her. The walk towards her is agonizing—your fear of rejection is slowly creeping up. Finally, you open her, and ask for her name.
“Sorry, I only talk to hot guys.” she says. You walk away feeling completely rejected, and wallow in self-pity for the rest of the night.
That, my friend, was a shit test. And you just failed it.
A lot of guys may get angry when they first realize that women test men. “What bitches,” the newbie may spout—or, “That’s so mean.” Or even worse, sometimes they can’t even accept it.
Don’t get mad. The reason that women test men is because they have to; this is how they figure out if you’re actually confident or not.
In other words, when a woman shit tests you, she’s screening to see if you’re going to be a frightened little baby and take it personally, or if you’re not even going to be emotionally affected by it.
Women test men, because they’re attracted to personality characteristics far more than your physical appearance. Sure, being jacked and having a six pack still helps (which is why I’m currently on SARMs, which are like legal steroids). But when it really comes down to it, women care a lot more about your frame.
Things like decisiveness, assertiveness, confidence, and frame control, are all very attractive to women. So what’s a girl to do? She can’t just ask “Hey, are you confident?” Obviously every guy is going to say yes. So instead, they test you to see if you’re actually confident.
That’s what a shit test does—it exposes any emotional neediness or insecurities you have.
In other words, a woman only tests you if she’s interested. When a woman shit tests me, the way that I interpret it is this: “Hmm. I’m interested in this guy, but I need to make sure he’s the real deal.”
And the best way to actually show her that you’re the real deal is to pass her shit tests.
Generally speaking, there are two strategies that I use to pass any shit test. The first is amplifying the frame, and the second is re-framing.
In order to understand these strategies, however, you must understand the concept of “frame control.”
In a nutshell, a frame is just a way of looking at reality. Frame control is how truly confident you are in that way of looking at reality. For example, say that you believe you’re the shit. That’s the frame.
Now, say that a girl starts to tease you and make fun of you—if she gets to you, and you get upset, you have poor frame control. Because a simple comment can shake your frame, it wasn’t that strong to begin with.
Her shit tests shook your frame and exposed your insecurities. This means you have poor frame control.
If, however, her tests don’t faze you, it usually means that you have strong frame control. Your sense of reality is very strong. You are convicted.
In order to employ these two strategies, you must get good at controlling your own frame. It takes practice, but anybody can do it. Get good at creating your own reality—don’t let others dictate it for you. Forge your own beliefs and believe in them so strongly that nothing can shake you.
The first way to pass a shit test is to agree with the girl, and take it to another level. For example, maybe a girl makes fun of you for driving a Prius.
“Oh, you must pull all the girls with that Prius,” she says. What would 99% of guys do? They’d get defensive.
“B-BUT The Prius is a very good economic choice due to its good fuel economy!” or something more subtle like “I bought it for financial reasons, not to pick up girls!” Instead of getting defensive, the best way to pass this test would be to amplify it.
“Yeah, I pull all the girls with my Prius.” or “Yeah, girls tell me my Prius is hot.”
Do you see how this is amplifying the frame? The frame that the girl sets at first is “You must pull girls with your Prius.” Obviously she’s saying it sarcastically, but it doesn’t matter—if you amplify the frame, you’ll pass the shit test.
Just take her frame (You pull girls with your Prius) and multiply it by 10. That’s what those two comments do—they convey the fact that yes, you do in fact pull girls with your Prius.
Obviously she’s going to know you’re joking, but you still passed the test—these comments show her that you’re not insecure about your car. You just go with the joke.
To be honest “amplifying the frame” is a great strategy, but it’s limited. It’s best to also combine it with the second strategy.
Re-Framing is by far more powerful than the first strategy. In essence, re-framing is simply accepting the facts that she states, but looking at them a different way.
For example, say that a girl makes fun of you for being short. This happens to me all the time, because I’m only 5’8″ so naturally I’ve become accustomed to passing this shit test.
“Haha, sorry…I don’t sleep with guys under 6 feet tall.”
What would 99% of guys respond with? They would try to qualify themselves—they would come up with a bunch of reasons why the girl should sleep with them.
“B-but I’m jacked!” or “B-but I’m rich!” or “B-but I have a huge dick!” None of that shit works (unless you’re saying it jokingly, but that’s another matter). Do you know what I say when a girl says something like that to me?
“Oh no, that’s okay—it makes me more attainable.” or “Nah, being short is cool. Tall guys cant fit through doors and shit.”
Boom—I accept the fact that I’m short, but I RE-FRAME it. It’s not that being short makes me unattractive, it’s that now I’m more attainable. If I was tall, I’d be way out of her league due to my other awesome qualities, but since I’m short I’m within her reach.
It’s that simple. Or maybe a girl makes fun of you for having large pecs (this also happens to me). “Haha you have moobs.” What would 99% of guys say to something like this?
“They’re called pecs, and it’s muscle!” or “Yeah, I’m trying to lose weight.” The best thing to do is to re-frame it.
“Yeah, they help me get in touch with my feminine side.”
Do you see how this is re-framing? You agree with her that you have moobs, but you re-frame it so that it’s a positive. Sometimes you can even completely reject her frame, and have it work extremely well.
For example, say that a girl makes fun of you for being bald. “You’re bald, that’s so gross!” In a situation like this, you could completely reject her frame and assert yours: “Nah, it’s hot.”
That’s it. The key is to say it 100% confidently, though—say it with 100% conviction. She’ll literally start cracking up (in a good way) and start to qualify herself to you.
Sometimes girls will throw multiple shit tests at you over the course of the night. That’s okay—just maintain the frame. Don’t let her shake your frame.
If you passed her first shit test by saying that being bald was hot, don’t you dare change your opinion about this. Stay convicted to what you said—don’t let her words shake your frame.
This is known as having strong frame-control. Literally 95% of game comes down to having strong frame control, so if you just work to cultivate a strong frame, you’ll find that everything else magically falls into place.
If you want more, consider checking out my “7 Strategies to Develop Your Masculinity” eBook that’s helped thousands of men 10x their results with women. It’s on sale for the next 24 hours only, and also comes with four free eBooks on Tinder, Night Game, and more.
Jon Anthony is a world renowned dating coach and the founder of Masculine Development, a website specifically dedicated to helping men improve their personal, dating, and financial lives. After years of training men how to attract women, build muscle, and make more money, Jon created the "7 Strategies" program to help kickstart your journey to success. Jon firmly believes that every man should have control over his own life, and he created Masculine Development to share his passion with men who want success in all areas.