In a previous article on the 4 Tactical Virtues of Masculinity, I presented a very practical, straight forward explanation of what it means to be a man on a primal level. Biologically, men are designed to protect the tribe from outside threats; this was their purpose for millions of years.
However, masculinity goes much deeper than man’s physical function. Masculinity is also spiritual—it’s those “Yang” characteristics that merge so well with a woman’s “Yin.”
To clarify, I am not confirming nor denying the existence of a non-physical world. When I say the word “spiritual,” I am referring to things which are greater than man, yet that he embodies and strives for; purpose, direction, and perseverance, among other things, are spiritual characteristics of man.
The goal of this article is to explain masculinity and in a deeper way. Man is more than just his physical purpose; he is also his spiritual purpose.
Taoism is a very interesting philosophy, in that it does not claim to have a way such as Christianity, Buddhism, or Hinduism does, but rather that it is the Way. In other words, it does not lay out a path for you to follow—it is the path.
This “Way,” cannot be understood conceptually—it cannot be heard, seen, or tasted. It does not exist in time, nor does it exist in space. It cannot be grasped with the intellect, yet somehow it’s so simple that a child could intuit it.
The Way is simply to be. There is no “objective,” one-size-fits-all Way, and yet, paradoxically, there is.
The way is different for every man, woman, and child—there is no… “objective” way. The Way simply means to be, or to practice your dharma, or your role to play in this giant cosmic theater show. The Tao Te Ching, which is one of my favorite Books on Masculine Spirituality, discusses this in depth.
One of the fundamental beliefs of Taoism is that the ideas of good/evil, light/dark, and other dichotomies are constructions of the mind. They don’t really exist without one another, and in fact, they only differ in varying degrees.
In other words, light cannot exist without darkness, and darkness cannot exist without light—they are one in the same; two sides of the same coin.
This is where the concept of “Yin and Yang” comes from.
Yin and Yang are often used to describe these “false dichotomies,” such as good/evil or light/dark. Yin is the dark side—it is receptive, passive, and intuitive. Yang is the light side—it is assertive, active, and analytical.
Both Yin and Yang are two parts of the same whole—without Yin, Yang would have no contrast, and thus would not exist. Without Yang, Yin would have no contrast, and thus would not exist.
These two paradoxical forces, or “energies,” as I will refer to them, can also be used to understand the concepts of femininity and masculinity on a spiritual, energetic level.
Feminine energy, which is the receptive, nurturing, and passive force in the Universe (and in the hearts of emotionally functional women), is basically Yin. Masculine energy on the other hand, which is the assertive, direct, and action-oriented force in the Universe, is basically Yang.
These two masculine and feminine energies depend upon one another to exist—and, in fact, one quite enjoys the other. This is why men typically gravitate towards women who are very receptive, nurturing, passive, and docile. It’s also why women crave men who are assertive, direct, and decisive.
Every human being has certain feminine characteristics and certain masculine characteristics, I understand this. I’m not trying to make men into caricatures that never feel or use their right-brain. I’m also not trying to make women into caricatures of complete drama-queens, unable to ever think logically.
BUT, with this being said, men and women tend to lean towards a certain side. Men are typically more assertive, confident, active, and direct. Women are typically more receptive, passive, intuitive, and indirect.
These characteristics can be understood through the lens of Yin and Yang, as I said before—Yin is feminine energy, and Yang is masculine energy.
Thus, masculinity, in the spiritual sense, means to embody “Yang,” and femininity, in the spiritual sense, means to embody “Ying.” Masculinity is identical to Yang, and Femininity is identical to Ying.
This is not to say that a man is not receptive or nurturing at times—it is crucial to have a balanced spirit. However, his predominant “energy,” will be that of Yang.
This is also not to say that women are sometimes assertive, direct, or logical; certainly they are at times. However, their predominant “energy,” is that of Yin.
It is important to note that Yin and Yang are opposites, and that opposites attract—at least in this case. This is why men and women complete each other in a spiritual sense. They balance out one another.
When a man completely embodies his “Yang,” or his masculinity, women are very attracted to this on a deep level. They can sense when a man is very grounded and centered in his masculine energy, almost as if they have a sixth sense.
Likewise, when a woman completely embodies her “Yin,” or her feminine energy, men are very attracted to this. Contrary to popular belief, and contrary to what the media brainwashes women with, men do not want overly-masculine women that can’t play a supportive role in a relationship.
In an ideal relationship, something very beautiful happens: a woman aligns her feminine energy with a man’s masculine energy, and they become one. They complete each other.
His masculinity complements her femininity, and her feminine energy complements his masculine energy. Their energies merge, in a sense, and align themselves towards accomplishing a single, greater purpose.
This is why it is so important for a man to have a strong frame—feminine energy naturally detects when masculine energy is faulty…and if it’s faulty, or unsure of itself, feminine energy will not align itself with it.
Women know when their man isn’t 100% sure of himself, and they will not align with him until they have complete trust in his unwavering certitude.
This is why women test men—they want to see how sure of himself he is. Their feminine energy wants to experience the unwavering, constant, beacon of masculine energy that their man should embody.
Unfortunately, most men don’t ever fully embody their Yang. This is one of the reasons that I made this website. I want to help men develop their masculinity, in all senses of the word.
Have you ever met a woman who just oozed sex appeal? I know that I definitely have. It happens very rarely, but every now and then I’ll spot a woman that is just so in touch with her feminine energy that you can literally feel it.
It’s something that you can’t pinpoint—it’s in the way that she moves, it’s in the way that she talks, it reverberates with every cell in her body.
I didn’t realize this for a long time, but this “sex appeal,” that I and other men often recognize is her embodying Yin, or feminine energy.
Whenever a woman is very sexy, it is because she embodies yin—it shows itself through her body language, facial expressions, tone of voice, and other nonverbal communications. Men are quite attuned to this, and we find it extremely attractive.
To embody Yin means to be receptive. It is feminine to be receptive. It means to be passive, and it means to be nurturing. It’s an entire way of BEING, a way of living life and interacting with the world in a receptive and intuitive manner.
Women want to receive energy from their environment—this is what feminine energy wants. It wants to receive, because it is formless. It wants masculine form to give it order and structure.
Feminine energy is receptive; it is passive and emotional. Its counterpart is that which is active. To feel is to receive. Women want to receive masculine energy—it completes them.
To put this in layman’s terms, women want to “vibe” off of a man. They want him to have a very strong sense of reality, and they want him to “penetrate” her, spiritually. They want to receive his reality; to be drawn into his world.
Feminine energy is intuitive—this is why women are often much more adept at social communication than men. Women are clearly experts at reading social cues and interpreting the emotional side of reality, and can often tell more about a man than he knows about himself, just from a quick glance.
This is what feminine energy does. It does not “think,” but rather, it “feels.” It does not logically analyze, but rather it uses intuition.
Do not place a label on whether it is better to feel or to think—men frequently think (haha, get it) that logic is superior to emotions, however this is not the case. They complement one another; both are two sides of the same coin, and are appropriate in different situations.
Feminine energy, due to its chaotic, ever-changing, emotional nature, is drawn to logical, firm, and steady masculine energy. Yang, or masculine energy, serves as a lighthouse, so to speak, that constantly grounds the tumultuous waves of emotion which feminine energy revels in.
Embodying masculinity, or masculine energy, is how you can become spiritually attractive. It’s how you can cultivate that “vibe,” or energy that women intuitively pick up on, and are drawn to like a magnet.
As a man, you do not have to be physically aesthetic to be very attractive to women. In fact, contrary to what our consumer culture tells us, women really don’t give a shit about looks. They care far more about a man’s energy and masculinity than anything else.
Look at Daniel Craig, Ryan Gosling, and Benedict Cumberbatch—they aren’t particularly physically attractive, are they? Daniel Craig has giant ears and a bloated nose, Ryan Gosling’s eyes are all fucked up, and Benedict Cumberbatch looks like a meerkat.
And yet despite this, women all agree that these men are incredibly sexy. Why? Again, it’s because they completely embody masculine energy. They all have the following characteristics:
Does James Bond ever look uncertain? No, he knows what he wants and he goes after it. He is active—he acts on his environment, rather than having it act on him. He does not get blown around like a leaf in the wind, he is the fucking wind.
Does Ryan Gosling ever seem ashamed of his personality, or insecure? No. He is extremely expressive of himself through his body language, facial expressions, and other nonverbals. He acts on his environment, it does not act on him.
Masculine energy is active and assertive—it knows where it’s going, and takes action to get there. Masculinity does not receive, but rather it goes forth. Masculine energy influences its environment, not the other way around.
Masculine energy is very clear in its intentions—there is never a doubt in its mind. It knows what it wants, and it takes action to get it. Masculinity is persistent and impregnable; it goes outward, expresses itself, and influences its reality.
It acts on its reality, rather than reality acting on it. This is the core of masculinity right here; masculine energy is a mover, rather than being moved.
This is what makes a man truly sexy—when he is the cause and not the effect, when he is completely himself and serves as a beacon for others to follow, when he is assertive and active, and when he does not let external reality dictate his internal reality.
When you begin to embody masculine energy, your life will naturally come together. When you begin to embody masculine energy, your health, finances, emotions, and sex life will all improve. Why? Because rather than simply expecting things to happen, you fucking make them happen.
You will find yourself making decisions with ease, that would have previously flustered you. You will find yourself pursuing the job that you really want, the relationships that you really want, and the goals that you really want to achieve.
Remember—Yang, or masculine energy, is active. It is assertive; it knows where it is going and what it wants. It is the driving force behind your entire life, and once you tap into it, you will experience massive abundance.
I believe that one of the easiest ways to embody masculine energy, and learn to channel your Yang, is to simply discover your life’s purpose. When you know WHY you’re doing things, it will light a fire under your ass and give you the drive necessary to accomplish your goals.
Discovering your life’s purpose is not easy. We are trained from a young age to shut up and follow the status quo. We’re trained to ignore our true desires, and to put on masks to function in society.
Consequently, much of our natural passion and desire is crushed out of us. But, there is hope—it can be cultivated and brought back to life. This is a gargantuan task, however, and it will take an enormous amount of introspection and effort, but it is completely possible.
If you’re struggling to discover your life’s purpose, I urge you to search through the archives of my blog and see what resonates with you. I have written extensively on this topic, and believe that with some effort, you can find your purpose.
If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, be sure to leave me a comment down below. I hope that you enjoyed the article, and I’ll see you next time around.
Jon Anthony is a world renowned dating coach and the founder of Masculine Development, a website specifically dedicated to helping men improve their personal, dating, and financial lives. After years of training men how to attract women, build muscle, and make more money, Jon created the "7 Strategies" program to help kickstart your journey to success. Jon firmly believes that every man should have control over his own life, and he created Masculine Development to share his passion with men who want success in all areas.