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Why A Lack of Masculinity is the Root Cause of Your Problems

masculine men statue

Masculinity is by far the most important characteristic that any man could possess.

One could spend an entire lifetime trying to define masculinity and all of its nuances, and I’m well on my way to doing so. But today I’d like to focus on something a little bit different.

Rather than talking about what masculinity is, I’d like to talk about how, without it, your life becomes a mess. When you have a lack of masculinity in your life, it doesn’t matter how hard you try to improve—you have to fix the root problem if you want to see any real improvement. And in this case, the root problem is a lack of masculinity.


Why Most Men Lack Masculinity

masculine men solution

If it isn’t already blatantly obvious, then let me make it so: most men lack masculinity. Most men drift through life without any sense of purpose or direction. Most men let the women in their lives call the shots, too afraid to upset their girlfriend or wife, lest she leave or stop putting out.

Too many men have been broken down to a childlike state—too afraid to express their masculinity and develop into the men that the world deserves. So, they just shut their trap, sit down, and keep quiet like a “good little boy.”

In my opinion, our culture’s lack of masculinity is a multi-faceted problem, and there are numerous causes that contribute to this lack. Here are the three main problems that are emasculating men today:


The Lack of Male Role Models

This is perhaps the biggest contributing factor towards the lack of masculinity in our society. As I have said many times before, boys used to learn how to be men by working alongside their fathers in the field.

As they would plow the ground, plant various seeds, and do other farm tasks together, young boys would get a chance to see their fathers in action. They would see how their fathers acted when something didn’t go their way, they would learn valuable life lessons from their fathers, and most importantly, they would develop a deep connection with them.

This all changed during the industrial revolution.

Suddenly, rather than boys working alongside their fathers, they practically never saw them. So, their mothers were tasked with raising them; and unfortunately, as much as I love women, they can’t teach boys how to be men.

Most boys nowadays are in the same situation—except it’s even worse. Not only do most men work all day and never see their sons, but the illegitimacy rate is at an all time high. This coupled with the fact that even when boys have men around, those men weren’t taught how to be men themselves, men are at an all time low.


Radical Misandry

I have to be very clear here, because I think that a lot of people misinterpret this blog (particularly radical feminists). Whenever I say “feminism,” I’m not talking about 1st or 2nd wave feminism. I’m talking about modern feminism, or neo-feminism.

Neo-feminism, in theory, is a wonderful thing. In practice, however, it leads to the downfall of nations. I do not speak these words lightly.

Neo-feminists often claim one thing, yet act as if the exact opposite is true. They claim that women are “equal,” whatever the fuck that means (it’s extremely vague and its meaning is easily manipulated depending on the situation), but then expect men to pay for their dates.

They expect to be allowed to vote, and to be given the responsibilities that men are given, but then have emotional meltdowns, and if you chastise them or refuse to back down, they use social pressure to make you look like a dick or a chauvinist.

This basically discourages men from expressing their masculinity—any time that they express too much, they’re “putz-shamed,” by neo-feminists who are trained to do this by our toxic media from a young age.

Women are trained from a young age to rebel against men, and it causes numerous problems in relationships. Feminism tells them that they “don’t need a man,” and that it’s sexist for her to submit to a strong, dominant man.

This is, of course, exactly what women want—they want a strong, confident man to lead them through life, because it makes them feel safe. But modern feminism isn’t concerned with what actually benefits women. It’s concerned with what feels good in the moment, regardless of what the facts state.

In short, neo-feminism has dissolved gender roles, and brainwashed boys from a young age to believe that there’s something wrong with masculinity.


No Masculine Outlets

It used to be that boys were allowed, and even encouraged, to rough house. Now, if a teacher gets caught letting boys rough house, she faces being fired. Adventure and physical confrontation is how boys learn about their boundaries. It’s how they grow and mature.

Rough play, adventure, and confronting danger is how boys grow into men. We aren’t allowed to do that anymore.

Even the slightest bit of confrontation is met with severe consequences nowadays. Our workplaces encourage passive aggressiveness, emotional manipulation, and other “feminine” battle tactics, while discouraging direct confrontation, and other “masculine” battle tactics.

Men aren’t allowed to rough play, to fight, or even to explore. I recall hearing a mother the other day talking about how her young boy isn’t allowed to walk around his neighborhood without supervision. And he’s 8 years old.

He can’t even walk around and try to start a pickup game of football with his buddies or something—he’s confined to his basement and his Xbox, and his development will suffer because of it. In a lot of ways, all boys experience this to some extent and it prevents them from developing into fully mature adults.


This Leads to Effeminate Men

masculine men what happened

When men aren’t taught how to be men, and, in fact, are discouraged from being men, they choose the only other option: to become effeminate.

From a young age, boys are discouraged from expressing their masculinity—we’re discouraged from acting sexually around women, from being confident and outgoing, and from having characteristics such as decisiveness and assertiveness.

So, what happens, then? Most men nowadays have become completely brainwashed to this “gender fluid,” garbage about how men aren’t supposed to be masculine.

Rather than being decisive and assertive, men become indecisive and unassertive. Rather than being direct and straight-forward, men become passive aggressive and petty. Rather than being emotionally strong, their emotions become dependent upon others around them.

In other words, they become feminine and not masculine.

Not that there’s anything wrong with being feminine…if you’re a woman. But men who aren’t masculine live a life that they aren’t meant to live. Men don’t ever become fulfilled unless they can attain a high level of masculinity. It is in our nature to feel happier when we have masculine characteristics, and to say otherwise is foolish.


Why You Need Masculinity

masculine men daniel craig

Women can get away with having very little to no masculine characteristics—they don’t need to be decisive, assertive, or confident in order to get the lives they want. Sure, women can have these characteristics if they want, but they don’t need them on the same level that men do.

As a side note, women can have masculine characteristics, just as men can have feminine characteristics. It’s retarded that I have to clarify this, but don’t fool yourself into thinking that only men can have masculine characteristics and only women can have feminine characteristics.

Now, of course women need to have some level of masculinity; they need to be able to stand up for themselves and make decisive decisions, and sometimes they need to be assertive to get what they want. But men literally need these characteristics about 10x more than women, and unfortunately, most men don’t have them.

The modern day media spits on masculinity, as if it’s somehow inferior to the values of femininity—I could go on for hours about how this is a horrible attitude to take, and how this attitude leads to the downfall of civilizations, but I won’t.

The point is, that if you don’t have masculinity, every area of your life goes to shit: your sex life, your career, your emotional health…nearly every aspect of your life completely falls apart without a masculine foundation.


Your Sex life Without Masculinity

how to become masculine men

If you haven’t taken the time to develop masculinity, here is probably what your sex life looks like: nothing.

Yup, that’s right. Maybe if you’re extremely good looking you’ll get laid once in a while, but even then you probably won’t. This is one of the biggest lies of our generation: that you can just be a “sweet guy,” and somehow girls will magically come falling from the sky to marry you.

In order to get women, you have to be masculine. You have to be decisive, assertive, and confident. These things used to be natural, but now men have to actually put in effort to accomplish these things.

If you don’t have these characteristics, women will walk all over you and manipulate you—and rightfully so. Women hate nothing more than a weak man. Deep down, they recognize that a man who is weak has betrayed himself—hell, I don’t like weak men, either.

If you’re not weak, however, and instead you’re very masculine, your love life will look much differently. Let’s use an in-depth example to clarify this concept.


Jerry isn’t Masculine

Jerry was raised by a single mother, and consequently develops very feminine characteristics. He probably didn’t get laid very much in high school or college, because he never had the balls to approach women at parties (if he even went out).

He learns about PUA culture, and goes out to his local nightclub. “Okay,” he thinks. “Time to do this.” So, he timidly walks up to a girl that he finds stunning, and asks “Uh h-hey, what’s your n-name? You’re really p-pretty.”

“Ugh,” she says and walks away. She’s repulsed by him.

What will then happen, is Jerry will start to develop a negative view of women, which will only exacerbate his problems. “All women only want assholes! They don’t want a nice guy like me!”

No, dude. Women want a guy who’s just not a complete doormat. But, nonetheless, Jerry will persist in his delusions.

Maybe he’ll get a girlfriend—she’ll be a real witch, I promise you that. She’ll meet Jerry out clubbing one night, and will instantly sense his weakness. She’ll subconsciously realize that he’s a man who can be manipulated, and will proceed to act sweet around him.

“Wow, this girl is so nice!” Jerry will think. “She appreciates me being a gentleman!” He says to himself. This girl, let’s call her Emma, will soon move in with Jerry. She’s only concerned with using him, but he doesn’t see this – he’s just happy to be getting laid.

Any time that an argument comes up, Jerry will slink away with his tail between his legs. “Oh god, no! I can’t offend her or she’ll leave me and I won’t have any sex!”

Unfortunately, however, him refusing to set firm boundaries only makes her more and more repulsed by him. Eventually, after Jerry buys her a whole bunch of expensive gifts, and she gets bored, she’ll dump his ass and go find some other chump to leech off of.

Or, even worse, Jerry will propose. “Oh my god, yes! I love you Jerry!” she’ll say.

But she doesn’t mean it. Within a year, she’ll get caught fucking the mailman and will divorce Jerry, taking half his shit.

“Women are evil! They’re all manipulative! Fucking whores!” Jerry will say to himself. What he doesn’t realize is that his weakness is what invited this into his life. If you’re a strong, confident, alpha male, as we’ll see, your sex life will look much different.


Jon is Masculine

Jon, in stark contrast to Jerry, has taken the time to develop his masculinity. He’s taken the time to cultivate characteristics such as decisiveness, a firm sense of self, strong boundaries, and a fucking spine.

When Jon goes out to the club, he meets a lot of girls—some like him, and some don’t. But he doesn’t care. “Haha, she doesn’t like me? She’s too dumb to see that I’m the shit,” he’ll think.

Maybe Jon will run into Emma, as well. “Woah, this guy is a challenge,” Emma will think. She’ll be determined to break him.

Now, I want to be very clear that this isn’t all women—obviously we’re all human beings and everyone is different, and women are no exception. Some women are really, really sweet and generous, while others are ridiculously manipulative. Such is life.

Regardless, as men we have to watch out for these things. I cannot tell you how many manipulative women I’ve encountered that have led me on, teased me, played games with me, and taken advantage of my weakness. Trust me, you don’t want to be in this position.

Regardless, let’s say that Jon and Emma start dating. Emma acts like a really sweet girl, but every now and then Jon notices something is off. She starts to sense Jon is becoming distant, so she attempts a preemptive strike: get into an argument and make him feel like the bad guy, so that he doesn’t realize she’s a manipulative bitch.

“What the fuck, Jon!” Emma will yell. She’ll start an argument over some completely ridiculous little thing. Will Jon take the bait, though? No. Unlike Jerry, Jon is truly confident that he can find another girl if he wants, so he sets a boundary.

“If you don’t stop playing games, I’m going to kick you out of my house, Emma.”

“What are you talking about, Jon?” Emma goes on and on, and Jon has enough. “Get out of my house, now.”

He kicks her out, and all she can think is “Holy shit. This guy isn’t like other guys—he isn’t afraid to lose me! He must have so many other options.” And like that, she’ll drunk call him one night begging to come over and “talk.”

“Hmm, alright—I’ll give you another chance,” Jon says. She comes over and he fucks her brains out. She thinks she’s got him, but decides to play it safe.

She showers him with gifts and love, but again, Jon isn’t an idiot—he starts to notice that she plays these little games, and her behavior is a little bit off. Emma decides to start an argument again, in an attempt to make Jon feel guilty so that he forgets about her manipulative tactics.

Jon gets fed up and kicks her out of his life. Then, the next day, he goes to the club, and pulls a stunner home.

All of this is only possible if Jon is confident and has firm boundaries.

If Jon wasn’t confident, he wouldn’t be able to stand up to Emma – if he didn’t have firm boundaries, he wouldn’t be able to kick Emma out.

But, because he’s taken the time to Develop his Masculinity, his sex life is thriving. He isn’t afraid of kicking a girl out if she acts up, because he’s confident in his abilities to find another girl.

Maybe he’ll end up marrying her. He’ll have a lifelong partner who supports him; she’ll make him breakfast every day, clean the house, and be emotionally supportive to him. He will in turn serve as her rock—when she becomes emotional, he will help calm her down and make her feel safe.

This is what an ideal relationship looks like; and you can’t have it until you’re masculine enough to polarize with a woman’s femininity.


Being Emotionally Masculine

masculine men
Do you think these men had time to cry because of some stupid little thing?

I want to make a very subtle point here. To be feminine is to draw state from without; to be masculine is to draw state within. In other words, women receive emotions from their environment, whereas men create their own emotions and influence their environments.

Obviously this is a MASSIVE generalization, but that’s the point—in general, generalizations are true. If this doesn’t make sense yet, that’s fine—I’ll use Jon and Jerry to help clarify.


Jerry Draws State From Without (Feminine)

Again, let’s assume that Jerry was raised by a single mother, so he has a load of feminine characteristics, and his emotional state is no exception.

When he sees that only 5 people liked his Facebook status, he’ll flip a shit and become depressed. “What the fuck! Am I not good enough? Why didn’t any more people like it? Should I say something different next time?” He’s letting Facebook influence his emotional state.

When a girl rejects him at the club, he’ll grow angry at himself and at women. “God, I’m not good enough! I’m so ugly, that’s why she rejected me! I’m not [insert quality here] enough! Women only want tall, jacked, handsome men! Fucking bitches.” He’s letting one girl’s rejection influence his emotional state.

When work gets tough, he’ll grow depressed and anxious. “Oh God, what if I can’t get this done on time? What if I can’t meet the deadline?” He’s letting his work influence his emotional state.

Do you see the common thread here? His environment is dictating his emotions, not the other way around.


Jon Draws State From Within (Masculine)

Jon, on the other hand, has taken time to develop his masculinity. He has enough emotional strength to create his own state.

When he sees that only 5 people liked his Facebook status, he won’t give a fuck. “Hmm, cool,” he’ll think. He won’t worry about changing himself for other people, he’ll just keep on doing him. His emotional state is influencing his Facebook posts, rather than his Facebook posts influencing his emotional state.

When a girl rejects him at the club, he won’t give a fuck, because the environment doesn’t affect his emotions. “Haha, cool,” he’ll think. He won’t care. Rather than some girl influencing his emotional state, his emotional state is like an impenetrable fortress, that only he controls.

When work gets tough, he’ll get tougher. “Okay, if I’m going to hit this goal by March 31st, I better do X Y and Z.” His motivation and emotions influence his work, rather than his work influencing his emotions.

Do you see the point? Jon creates his own emotions and his own reality; he doesn’t let reality create his emotions.

This is what it means to be masculine in the emotional area of your life.


Being Financially Masculine

masculine men with lamborghini

Men have always been the shakers and producers. They’re the ones that build empires. They’re the ones that create businesses. As much as neo-feminism likes to deny this, claiming that it’s “sexist,” it’s not. It’s just a fact.

Masculine men have always been the shakers and producers. Your masculine mindset (or lack, thereof) will largely influence the amount of financial success you encounter, because it will determine your ability to persevere through difficult external stimuli.


Jerry is too Feminine

As I have said before, feminine characteristics are typically things like receptivity, nurturing, being agreeable, and valuing social cohesion more than logical information.

So, when Jerry’s confronted with a decision that could potentially earn him millions, what will he do?

Rather than being masculine and taking a risk, he’ll just do what “feels safe,” and he’ll never start that business.

He’ll never accomplish his masculine goals, because he’s too feminine. He’s too concerned with what feels safe; he doesn’t want to step on any heads or shake anything up, so he ends up working some dead end job for the rest of his life. He dies a broke man.

Damn it, Jerry. Can you just fucking read my blog already?


Jon is Masculine

Masculine characteristics, on the other hand, typically involve things like aggression, ambition, and risk-taking. Higher testosterone levels have been linked to higher income, in fact.

When Jon is confronted with the decision to either earn $55,000 a year at a nice steady job, or to start his own business and potentially earn millions a year while changing the world, what do you think he’ll choose?

He’ll choose to start a fucking business.

And because he has masculine characteristics such as decisiveness, assertiveness, confidence, and persistence, he’ll likely make it work out. Sure, he may be less better off financially at first, but eventually he’ll be loaded and will be doing what he loves for a living.


This is YOUR Life

masculine men poseidon

As you can see, when men are too feminine, their lives suck. If you’re too feminine, you won’t have the sex life you want, you won’t be happy, and you won’t have the financial success that you want.

If you’re masculine, on the other hand, everything will naturally fall into place: your depression will be cured, because you’re not relying on your external environment to fix it, you just fix it yourself.

Your fear of talking to women? It’s because they’re influencing you. When you develop your masculinity, you’re the one who influences them. Your emotional state influences your external reality as opposed to women influencing your internal reality.

All of your problems will naturally fix themselves when you become more masculine.

That’s why I recently launched my eBook: 7 Strategies to Develop Your Masculinity.

After fixing most of my problems (or at least improving them drastically), I’ve come to realize that the only way that I was able to create lasting change was through developing masculine characteristics such as:

  • Being the cause, not the effect
  • A firm sense of self
  • Having rock-solid confidence
  • Setting up firm boundaries
  • Assertiveness
  • Decisiveness

Once you develop these characteristics, all of your other problems will naturally fix themselves. Try it, and you will see. Be sure to leave any comments or questions below, as well—I love hearing from my followers, and I respond to all of them.

I hope that you guys enjoyed the article, and remember: nothing will change unless YOU make a change. So get to it, because this is your life, and it’s ending one second at a time.

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3 months ago

I am having this exact problem with my fiancé right now . We have been together for years and he’s a sweet , very good looking guy. The problem is what I use to find so sweet about him I now find incredibly weak. He’s child like, he speaks softly, he never gets angry and even when he does it’s almost pathetic . I want him to take control of situations , I want to feel safe with him but it’s always me that has to nag and bitch to get him to take control of the situation and I feel like it’s me that has to protect him. Our sex life use to be incredible . He’s a great lover however for the last year I have faked every organism because I feel he has sex with me because it’s expected . His testosterone levels were checked and normal but it’s his lack of drive and effort in every aspect of life that is now showing in our sex life . I crave a tall, strong , manly man. One that works hard , plays harder . He doesn’t have to be perfect or have a great body but for Gods sake if your a small guy then hit the damn gym. Your girlfriend should not be bigger than you! I don’t ever allow him to ride me on his bike or do anything that requires physical strength because honestly I don’t think he can protect me. It’s embarrassing . I am far from perfect myself, I have a lot of things that I need to work on as a woman but I have come to resent him for making me have to be more masculine in the relationship because he has refused to “ man up”. I hate taking charge, I hate being dominating , I hate making the decisions but I have to cause he isn’t going to. He only does any of those things when he senses I am getting pissed . I’m at the point now where I realize marriage is probably not in our future and it’s a shame . If he had only taken the time and made an effort to man the fuck up wr could of had a beautiful relationship. I know I sound like a raging bitch it honestly I have never been with any man before him. It’s probably from all the testosterone I now have from being the man in this relationship . For Gods sake guys take it from a woman that is considered well above average in looks , is educated , works and doesn’t have any baggage ,all this male bashing toxic masculinity bullshit they preach now a days is just that bullshit ! Yes bring a loving man is absolutely necessary but you also have to be a leader and a protector. You have to be strong both body and mind. Look at the old cowboys as an example. Look at the older generations, back when men were men. Grow a beard, get some tats, wear wranglers , get some work boots , raise your voice ,( practice using a strong authoritative voice not some squeaky quiet meek girly voice ) hit the damn gym or get a job that requires you to actually work hard . A woman would rather have a heavier man with a few xtra pounds than a skinny scrawny girl with skinny jeans and a murse. God I wish I could go back to the 1800s when men were men. After writing this I realize it’s time to let him go. I’m sure other women will find him very attractive , however, eventually they will leave too. All this liberal bullshit is lies . Lay off the soy, stop eating foods and using products with estrogen in it and grow some balls.

Does Jon take care of the masculine home duties or just work out and go to clubs? Can and will Jon change the oil? Fix the shed? Landscape the yard? Be sure his wife is as sexually satisfied as he is?

1 year ago

I’m a South Eastern woman, our men are crazy about our strong personalities, they don’t like indecisive gaga babies

Happy I’m not a western woman where the men need to demean women to build themselves up

1 year ago

Really great article and I think you’ve hit the nail on the head with your thoughts. As an alpha woman I am tired of taking charge and only seeing a whole bunch of men act masculine, without actually being masculine. I’m a single mother of an amazing baby boy and it would make me very sad indeed if he became feminine. I’m hoping some of my alpha traits will transfer over as I am very direct, run my own business and teach, am assertive, confident, and decisive. Because I want him to be masculine and to fully embrace his masculinity without a care in the world about what this mentally ill society thinks of his masculinity. What’s your advice on helping him become an awesome and masculine man without a dad? Thanks.

2 years ago

As a woman, I read this article to help understand why I wasn’t connecting more with a great guy who I like but who is passive. He looks great and is a great father and I can really talk to him, but I don’t feel like I can trust him to lead me. I told him I would like him to be more assertive, and he thought about it for awhile and later responded that he should be liked as he is. I have been pondering this for awhile, wondering why I can’t be more willing to commit to someone who is ready and interested in committing to me. I called it off with him once and felt terrible, because he is a good friend and like I said I can really communicate with him. I just don’t see myself being happily committed or marrying him because he lacks strong leadership skills. Now that I understand this I feel that I will need to call it off again, and be brave enough to tell him why. I will certainly miss him.

3 years ago

Let’s also look at Jon and Jerry from a woman’s perspective.

Imagine you’re a young, attractive single woman. You begin texting two men – one is Jon, and one is Jerry.

Let’s start with Jerry. He seems nice enough, being single for a while it’s nice to talk to a guy without him breathing down your neck to get into your pants. But as the conversation goes on, you find out this guy can’t really hold a conversation. He only Asks about you, never talks about himself or feeds off of anything you say. He responds to your questions in a pleasant, but complacent manner. He asks you if you want to hang out. You’re not totally sure, but want to give this guy a chance. You say yes. And get this, he leaves the planning UP TO YOU. He’ll do anything YOU want. He asks YOU where YOU want to meet and what works for YOU. Now, at this point, you don’t want to give this guy a chance. He blew it. Why? Because by leaving everything up to you, he becomes a burden, not an asset. You already have enough to manage in your life. You live alone. You work a full time job in a male- dominated field. You’re the main planner and initiator in your group of girlfriends. While you enjoy being a strong, independent woman who doesn’t “need” a man, your relationship is the one area in your life where you can GET A FUCKING BREAK. By taking a step back from being the manager, you feel at ease, relieved, and safe. You can finally retreat and decompress after a long day of controlling absolutely everything. And this guy did not, cannot, and will not provide that. So you refuse. But then he KEEPS TEXTING YOU. You want to EXPLODE, because he has no idea how stressed, burdened, and unsafe he makes you feel. And on top of all this, he’s begging for your attention. You don’t need him. You’re not dying for a relationship. He is. So now you also feel like a means to an end for him. The resentment will keep building, until either Jerry gets the damn hint, or you confront him, which may not be in the most pleasant manner considering how he doesn’t only annoy you, he throws you into survival mode.

Then, you start texting Jon. The conversation flows much more naturally. He feeds off of what you say. He talks about himself. The question/answer ratio from each person is a lot more equal. He’s INTERESTING. He throws a compliment or two in there, but not so much to smother you. Not only are you interested, but you’re shocked. Not only is it a relief that a guy is getting to know you for you and doesn’t want to just get into your pants, but him showing initiative is RELIEVING. Finally, you feel like you don’t have to PUSH or manage this person. He continues to direct and show initiative, even if you’re the one who texted first. He straight up says he likes you. And guess what? YOU LIKE HIM TOO. You arrange to see each other. You may even be the one to do most of the traveling, not only because you want to pull your weight and show that you’re interested, but because he’s demonstrated that he’s strong enough for you to put your trust in him when you’re on his turf. He makes the plans, shows he can lead. You feel safe. You can relax. Chemistry can grow, naturally. He’s someone you can fall into when your non-stop world of work and planning leaves you needing to take a load off. You naturally become more sweet, nuturing, and patient than you usually are, because your needs are being answered and you grow comfortable becoming this person, which makes HIM feel safe. And you get genuine enjoyment out of making him happy. Jon, for his part, can’t believe he’s found someone that actually makes HIM feel safe. Maybe down the road you and Jon fall in love and marry.

This is exactly what’s going through a woman’s head when you present yourself as either guy A or guy B. Most women are not blunt enough to tell you any of this, especially how they respond if you’re a Jerry.

Flavio Lujan
3 years ago

Summary of Masculinity:

Don’t be a bitch.

Much more helpful advice for anyone stumbling onto this thing:

Stick to a routine.
don’t procrastinate.
Get shit done.
Go socialize.
Be a human being.

3 years ago

I think what I’m trying to ask is this : How can someone go out to approach girls / go out alone whilst still being rooted in their purpose – wouldnt that be going against it

3 years ago
Reply to  Jon Anthony

Yeah, I know.

I guess what I was trying to ask is if I can go out and game women – without losing / being grounded in my masculine purpose – the one in the 7 strategies.

3 years ago

And if pursuing your masculine purpose allegedly eliminates 85% of the fear around women, where does actually going after women factor in, – like going out to approach

3 years ago

So basically what you’re saying is, is that the main reason so many men have trouble with talking to women is because they have no purpose – masculinity?
And that when men focus on their own purpose, they can then branch off into getting women here and there?

I find it was hard to believe at first, my mindset was focus on getting women – but I guess that’s where all the neediness and lack of congruence comes from

4 years ago

This a sad incel website

5 years ago

So politically incorrect. Thank you for having the courage to keep it real man, seriously. The world could use more of this type of honesty.

Ameerah Muhammad
5 years ago

I am a 25 year old lady and everything this man is saying is TRUE. There is nothing worse than a man you can run over. Or a man who has no backbone. Women can sense when a man doesn’t have these masculine characteristics. It’s such a turn off. He’s not saying that men should be assholes. He’s saying that women will respect men who are confident, take the lead, and are emotionally stable. I’m with a guy now and I’m thinking about breaking up with him because he’s just so weak. He literally cries, will do practically anything I tell him, can’t handle his liquor, does not take the lead, is extremely indecisive and has no confidence, and is self centered on top of this.I thought maybe i could “help” him, but I’m just so turned off that I feel like I should just break up with him. I feel sad for him because I don’t know what woman would stay with him unless they’re using him. I don’t know if i should break up with him and tell him the real reason why or break up with him and say it’s me. How will he ever know what he’s doing wrong unless someone tells him ?

Jon Anthony
5 years ago

A lot of girls struggle with this problem, as far as I can tell. I don’t know your boyfriend very well, but I do know one thing: you can never change people unless they want to change. If you’ve brought this up with him, and he’s attacked you or gotten overly defensive, then he probably doesn’t want to change.

5 years ago

You seem very confused and I’m worried for you. Would you say that you are able to live an enjoyable life with fulfilling relationships? If so, I am very very impressed.

5 years ago

Its evident that you have fallen for the societal creation that is masculinity – created by insecure men, to reassure insecure men. Its a toxic circle.

Jon Anthony
5 years ago
Reply to  Meg


1 year ago
Reply to  Meg

They tend to link high achievement to testostrone High achievement is an individual personality trait Women men whatever have individual traits not hardwired traits The clubbing, sleeping around, chasing women is obnoxious and demeaning , STDs exist , throwing caution to the wind is bad for all of society , irresponsible
What is interesting is high achievement in women is viewed as a threat , this threatens their masculine fantasy world They like a passive woman , she doesn’t threaten their fantasy , she lacks ambition , she lacks resolve, she makes the perfect trophy wife to show off to male peers

Ryan Parker
6 years ago

Hey everybody and especially Mr. Jon Anthony. I am Ryan and I am following Masculine Development since 9 months.

But before that I was following everyone who talks about self development and all about Masculinity. They all just act as anti-feminist and say shit about everyone and tell about how great is Alpha Male. “If you follow my rules you’ll get girls” or “If you act like an Alpha I.e. James Bond or something girls get crazy over you”. I was just wandering with all explanations for about a year. I was self hatred about my failures. I wasted literally $500 on eBooks which are all garbage, I’ll not mention their names though.

But suddenly I googled about ” How to be an Alpha Male” I got this site and I got impressed about Jon’s idea on Mindset and how changing the mindset can make a men Alpha. I read few of his articles and thought to buy his “7 strategeis to develop your masculinity”. I bought his ebook in January 2017, as I opened in my PC, it’s introduction was enough to say how excellent this book is. I got through strategies from #1 to #7, not a single page was boring, for me strategies #1,#2,#3, #4, #6 worked great.

What I do is as soon as I wake up I follow Jon’s moring routine in the eBook I always feel refreshed and alert without having coffee. Then I follow Jon’s productivity Gems to finish my stuff and then I go out evening for gaming and fun and then simply I sit and meditate and head to bed. Guys it’s so good as if you are doing all the work and having great moments of pleasure and fun.

Jon said in this article that “Masculinity is the root cause of all the problems” and this is 100% fact. Everyone just give all rules to follow and assure that if you follow these rules your problems will get solved but what they don’t know is lack of masculinity is really the root cause.
But lack of masculinity doesn’t means to be feminine, it means to be simply lacking all qualities for being a Men.

Anyways I had Anxiety disorders since I lost everything because I was removed from the job. I simply followed this blog and did all the things to improve my conditions and guess what happened. I recovered successfully my finances and handled my family and my life. Now as I am writing this I am glad to say that I am starting a company tomorrow and I’ll be the Founder of the company.

Everybody just follow this blog and please buy “7 strategies to develop your masculinity”. Hope so your life may change. Thank you Jon for sharing your ideas with us and helping us to improve. God bless You.

Note: I have not written anything under pressure of someone. I buyed his book and gave a review about how good this eBook is for changing your life.

Jon Anthony
6 years ago
Reply to  Ryan Parker

Seeing this comment made my day, man. Thank so much for the feedback – I’m glad to hear your life is much better now 🙂

Ryan Parker
6 years ago
Reply to  Jon Anthony

Jon, now I got the real way to succeed, it’s not like waking up early and follow the tips and tricks of famous entrepreneurs like Bill Gates or Warren Buffet, etc. It’s like taking smaller steps to get massive runs. For eg. If a men wants to be healthy then he should first simply walk for few minutes, even this could make him healthy rather doing hybrid lifting or gymming, isn’t it ?

The Way of Superior Men is the excellent book, for me, it improved my life a lot.

Success is really a mindset, it develops when a men gets an access to his masculinity. And when a men does this the life problems like anger, fear, approach anxiety, sadness, hopelessness, apathy, etc goes off. And suddenly men acts like a men and has an access of limitless energy which he uses to make his dreams become a reality. I am saying this as per my experience. Am I right here ??

Jon Anthony
6 years ago
Reply to  Ryan Parker

This is good advice. Waking up early, having a morning routine, following the advice of successful men, etc. helps, but success isn’t an event. It’s a process.

Armani Bless
6 years ago

Great article. I see why where I am right now. Back to the drawing boards. I going to increase my masculine as much as possible.

6 years ago

Lets assume for a moment than Jesus and his story was real, do you think he acted like real man?

3 months ago
Reply to  SG

He was a leader and didn’t care about people’s perception of him but rather stick to his beliefs and his people.

7 years ago

Hey, great article. I can totally get where you’re coming from, but this isn’t always 100 percent true. I am a very feminine guy (thoughtful, empathetic, prefers traditionally female pursuits and such) but I’m confident, assertive, decisive and everything else you listed. Honestly, those traits are not exclusively masculine. On top of that, sex life isn’t determined by masculinity or femininity but I’m gay so I guess that’s a little different. Anyway, I can see the ideas you’re getting across but they don’t seem very “masculine” to me personally. Great article, though.

Tom Arrow
7 years ago

I wish you would have shown a little more understanding for that anger of Jerry’s. I was/am like him in many ways. And I technically agree with all you write in this article, but I find myself put off by your dismissal of Jerry’s emotions as delusional. If you think about it, they are there for a good reason, after years of emotional abuse suffered under the hands of a single mother.

But I guess one can tend to start resenting that which one no longer is, when it has proven ineffective.

7 years ago

Everything on here makes sense. Just a matter of getting off my ass and trying to change. Another brilliant article. Thank you.

7 years ago

This site is simply amazing. I’m in the process of renewing my life, switching my weakness into strength and confidence, and this article is more than suitable in order to achieve my goals. Thanks for writing this article.

7 years ago

Real strong women aren´t feminists and donpt think themselves equal to men at all, because they do not compare two complementary human beings. Strong women love strong men. Real ,strong women are emotionally stable, loyal, loving partners that resemble nothing of the selfish, egotistic, shallow, shell of a human being feminists usually are. Strong women go to work if they have to, but are equally satisfied in contributing to the partnership by tending to their personal life. Strong women only date and marry strong, loyal, loving men they can respect. A man can´t call himself a man until he earned the respect of a real Feminine woman. Getting money and a sixpack is nice, but anyone can do that… Building a strong character, on the other hand, is insanely difficult, and that is what makes a boy into a real Masculine man.

Lord Kibble
6 years ago
Reply to  Susanna

A real man isn’t defined by anything a woman does and doesn’t need any validation from a woman. It’s nice but absolutely not necessary.

7 years ago

Excellent article. Simple clear articulation of important concepts that guys struggle to understand. I loved what you said in Emotional Health about the Masculine drawing state from within versus without. This is something I’ve been teaching for years – you defined this M/F difference perfectly.

7 years ago

Great article! I related with Jerry and Jon, as I have cycled through both all through out my life. I didn’t have a father figure to pass down the ways of the masculine. Now that I have a son, just turned thirteen, it’s my responsibility to bring him up proper. I’m looking towards articles and websites like this to help me close that gap. Keep up the good work.

Thomas Personlig Coach
7 years ago

This is a very good post and the examples really nails it!
Thanks, I have now signed up for email updates.

7 years ago

This article makes a profound revelation that is a game changer for me. Thanks for writing it.

7 years ago

Good shit. Found this via ROK.

A. Nonymous
7 years ago

Dude, I love hearing your Jon/Jerry analysis every time! I lost it at “Why can’t he just read my blog already?”

7 years ago

Another excellent article. You are one of the few in the “manosphere” that actually gets it in my opinion. Keep soldiering on. We need more of this.

Jon Anthony
7 years ago
Reply to  Alan

Thanks man, I really appreciate it!


What's Up, I'm Jon Anthony

Women. Fitness. Money. I’ll help you achieve it.

After dropping out of college to pursue my dreams, I started this blog as a way to help other men do the same.

What started off as a fun hobby, grew into a full-scale 6-figure business that’s changing the lives of men worldwide.


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