Several years ago, I met a gorgeous woman from South Africa.
We immediately hit it off, and began dating and sleeping together for about a year.
“Come visit me,” she said. “I want to see you again,” she told me.
…and she probably meant it. But things change. Sometimes, things don’t work out.
Sometimes, girls just stop showing interest in you…and often, it isn’t clear what to do.
At first, things were great. I’d send her a message, and she’d reply promptly. I’d often receive pictures from her, too.
Over time however, she stopped engaging with me.
She’d tell me that she “knows how I treat women,” and that I’m just some “player” who doesn’t care about her.
Can I blame her for thinking this? Probably not. I do have quite the reputation, being a pickup artist and all.
I really did like her, though. For whatever reason, she may have changed her mind about me.
I don’t know why, but all I know is one thing: it’s time to move forward.
Whenever a girl loses interest in you, there is only one thing you can do: move on.
As much as it sucks to hear this, there is no magical way to get a girl back.
If there was though, it’s this: move on. Make your life so great, that she has no choice but to notice you again.
This is the premise of Lifestyle Game.
The only way to ever truly get a woman back into your life, with her respect for you intact, is to do it without pressuring her.
The second you try to “chase” her, is the second that things go wrong.
Casanova once said that man should “be the flame, not the moth.” This is immutably true.
Do not chase women. Let them come to you.
Could this woman’s “disinterest” just be some elaborate, long distance form of a shit test? Quite possibly, yes.
My response however, will still be the same: chase what should be chased.
Women chase men, but men chase their purpose.
Etch that line into your skull, forever and always.
As a man, your purpose must come before a woman. Otherwise, she will lose attraction to you.
I don’t make the rules, I just tell them how they are.
The fact of the matter is that women are drawn to men who are drawn to purpose. They want a man who follows something bigger than himself.
That purpose can be anything. It can be to just “relax,” or it can be to build a multi-billion dollar business that changes lives.
The point is, that you must have a purpose. You must be selfish. You must put yourself first.
Sometimes, women will feign disinterest in you.
It’s funny, because as a pickup artist, I’m so cocky that I almost always interpret any sort of disinterest as feigned disinterest.
Feigned disinterest is meant to test your resolve. It’s meant to see what you’re made of.
They want to see how strong you are, and how much of a man you are.
Will you pass their tests, or will you be a little bitch?
When a woman feigns disinterest, what do I do? What I always do. Keep staying on my purpose.
She doesn’t text you back right away? Who cares?
She ignores your phone calls? Who cares?
She plays “hard to get”? Who cares?
When you have your masculine purpose, nothing else matters.
It’s funny, because as I advance in the world, I notice many patterns.
One of these patterns, is that girls who previously “rejected” me are now chasing me back.
They see that over the past 2-3 years I’ve far surpassed any guys they wanted.
While they’re working a 9-5, I’m working the hours of “whenever the fuck I want to work.”
While they’re budgeting bills, I’m blowing cash on vacations.
While they’re getting laid twice a month, I’m getting laid twice a day.
While they’re slaves, I am one of the truly free.
Are you truly free?
If not, then be so. Take steps to reclaim your freedom.
When women see that you can withstand the test of time, they will want you back more than anything.
This South African girl? I know she’ll come back, because they always do.
In 5 years when they see me speaking in front of a crowd of 10,000 men, or driving Lamborghinis with celebrities, they’ll come back.
Thus is the nature of women. They want the man who can progress. They want a man they can trust.
“But Jon, how can you not be bitter?” you might ask. I get this question a lot.
“Aren’t you bitter that they didn’t want you before?” someone will say.
No, I’m not, my friend…and here’s why.
Are you bitter that you’re attracted to a beautiful face with some nice tits?
No? Wow, what a surprise.
It’s in our biology to want fertility in a woman. Just as women want utility in a man.
Women want men who are successful, plain and simple. You can either whine about it, or you can make a change.
It’s easy to complain. It’s easy to wallow in your own resentment.
But it’s hard to make a change.
This is what separates the mediocre from the great.
The path to getting a girl back is quite simple.
As I’ve said, there’s only one thing you must do.
Stay strong on your path, and improve yourself by 1% every day.
If she doesn’t come back? That sucks, but it’s okay.
Everything will work out in the end.
When you have the courage to take a chance, your life will begin to unfold magically.
I know it sounds like a lie, but it’s true.
Merely facing life with courage, and doing the best you can, is often enough to get whatever you want.
5 years ago, I never thought I’d be making the money I am now.
But I didn’t need to think it. I just needed to believe it.
…and that’s all you need. Just believe, take the chance, and you will see.
Jon Anthony is a world renowned dating coach and the founder of Masculine Development, a website specifically dedicated to helping men improve their personal, dating, and financial lives. After years of training men how to attract women, build muscle, and make more money, Jon created the "7 Strategies" program to help kickstart your journey to success. Jon firmly believes that every man should have control over his own life, and he created Masculine Development to share his passion with men who want success in all areas.